Monday, August 01, 2005
Who do spiders work for..?
Okay, so I am sitting here at the computer debating if I feel like masturbating or not, when I decide to just go get a pack of cigarettes (I'll stop 100% when something happens that I am sorta hopin for.... no, not lung cancer - something else) and swing by Dunkin Donuts for some coffee and munchkins.
Munchkins fucking rock dude.
Anyway, I get my cigarettes in the gangsta Exxon and head down toward Dunkin Donuts.
While driving along minding my own business and singing the theme song to Kim Possible (please don't ask me why, I don't even know myself) I notice something out of the corner of my eye.
A spider. A little spider is hanging from a piece of web 4 inches from my face.
My reaction is cold and calculated. I am too into my Kim Possible theme song to get all worked up over this little assasin hanging there near my face. So, without effort, I flick him away.
In any normal situation, the flick would have done my evil foe in, but as fate had it - this time he just swung right back and disappeared.
That was it! Suddenly my testosterone dropped to dangerous levels and I was screaming, jumping and swerving between lanes (much to the dismay of the car behind me) in a desperate attempt to locate the little fucker.
Obviously he was an assasin on a mission and had done his job. I almost hit the curb, pissed off the driver behind me and was barely able to focus on the wheel.
Then.. I saw him. Trying to slip away under the protection of my seat belt clicky thing. I grabbed a shirt and SMASH! Took the fucker out.
Now I am here, enjoying munchkins and coffee -- when will they learn to stop trying to attack me...